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BLACK HORSE EXTRA


For the latest edition of the Black Horse Western free online magazine please follow this trail . . . !

 
Stay here for the thrilling opening to
an adventure of the scallywag
frontier heroine Miss Lilian Goodnight:
 
MISFIT LIL CHEATS
THE HANGROPE


A novel by Chap O'Keefe
published as an original BHE paperback,
available from
WHSmith, amazon.co.uk,
Foyles (free p&p in UK),
amazon.com and lulu.com,
and as a library large-print edition from Ulverscroft


The irrepressible Misfit Lil was riding for a fall. She'd chosen
to intervene in the fortunes of a wagon train of emigrants
led on wrong trails by Luke Reiner, their incompetent guide.
And Reiner, hiding an outlaw past, didn't care to have Lil
messing with his reputation.

Lil's first mistake was in saving a bunch of buttons when
the wagons were caught in a ferocious blizzard. Then
she recommended her hero, frontiersman Jackson Farraday,
to help out, which pitched him into a bloody fight with
Reiner. Tangles tightened when the wagonmaster's
pretty daughter, Honesty Petrie, took a flirtatious hand. . . .

But worse was to follow. Jackson was accused of murder!
Could Lil save him from the noose into which she'd run his neck?
 


             
       

  

MISS LILIAN GOODNIGHT was reputed to be hard to shock. Indeed, it was she who was apt to shock the country around Silver Vein; what some considered her outrageous behaviour had earned her the moniker Misfit Lil.

But the wagon train came as a shock to Lil.

And it kept right on producing shocks of one sort or another to which she wasn't immune for several tense and troubling weeks in the early spring.

Lil sighted the wagon train from a vantage point high on a lonely, windswept ridge in the northernmost section of her father's Flying G range where she had spent the bleakest part of winter manning an isolated  line camp.

The word manning could be used advisedly because, notwithstanding youth and gender, Lil knew as much about range work and the rugged country – part of a land she loved – as any of her pa's forty-and-found cowpunchers.

The wagon train was out of place and out of time, strung haphazardly like two rows of child's pull-along toys across the speckled greys, ochres and dark greens of a sparsely grown granitic landscape still obscured in places by unmelted snow.

It was out of place because most of the emigrants bound for California and other points on the Far West frontier traversed Utah in the vicinity of the Great Salt Lake, many miles to the north of this difficult stretch. For reasons unreadable to Lil, the small train had looped south.

It was out of time because the movement of hopeful settlers by wagon train had about come to an end. Also, more immediately than representing the tail end of a passing era, the cavalcade Lil saw was daringly early in the season for travel through mountainous ranges where snow fell from mid-October and sometimes remained on the ground right up until July.

To Lil's experienced gaze, the weather today was due to turn treacherous. A glint in her grey eyes generally denoted she had some playful mischief afoot. Now, it was a glint of concern.

A bank of huge black clouds had piled up on the jagged horizon. That was ominous. A snowstorm was in the offing. Lil knew swirling blasts of the icy white stuff could reduce the wagon drivers' visibility nigh to zero, rip at the big rigs' canvas covers and penetrate maybe greenhorn travellers' store-bought Eastern clothing like knife thrusts. The wagons' progress would become blind and perilous.

The breeze stiffened, blowing from the north.

In automatic reflex, Lil's trusty grey cow-pony Rebel turned his rump to the rising wind, tail whipping between his legs. But she had trained her mount from a foal and he responded obediently when she pulled his head round again and set them off downslope for the wagons.

Men were moving up and down the length of the train yelling orders, checking harness and gear and putting ropes on the farm animals that walked in the space between the two lines of wagons. Lil let her eyes rove over the emigrants.

One of the party sat on horseback off to one side. He was a burly man she took to be the emigrants' hired trail guide. He was dressed like a frontiersman in buckskins similar to those favoured by herself and her friend and reluctant idol, the civilian Army scout Jackson Farraday. But buckskins looked right when she saw them on Jackson and she felt comfortable in hers. This blocky, bulky man with a fleshy but hard face was neither right nor comfortable in his duds.

He saw her coming and tensed – till he saw she was a girl and therefore, he possibly thought, of no account.

"Who you staring at, gal? What do you want?" he called, his face darkening.

"Not staring," Lil said calmly. "Just wondering what y'all plan on doing."

"Is that so?" the guide snarled. "Well, damned if that'd be any business o' your'n, missy. Hightail it!"

"Don't get proddy, mister. I figured I could give you strangers some help is all. Humdinger of a storm a-coming . . . a blizzard, I'd opine."

"Damn me – ain't that the truth, gal!" the guide said sarcastically. "We got eyes of our own."

"Are you the wagonmaster?" Lil asked.

"I speak for him! I'm his scout and guide. Winton Petrie's the captain. He gathered these farming folks together back in Missouri and they signed up with the wagon train."

Lil could imagine how it was. No single wagon stood much of a chance of completing a lone trek across dangerous, unknown country – across deserts, over mountains, through Indian territory. It was still not much more than half a lifetime since such perilous, lengthy journeys had been for none but missionaries and mountain men. In a group, it would still be tough on the men, and tougher again on their womenfolk and children. But they could travel together sharing challenges and troubles; sharing hopes for starting over in fresh country, like California or Oregon, that held the promise of a bright future.

"What is it, Reiner?" another voice boomed.

Lil's eyes went to the speaker. He was in his early fifties, a rugged man with the hard-worn looks of a farmer, stepping out alongside the lead wagon, which was drawn by oxen. An imposingly heavy beard and moustache, as well as his carrying voice, lent him an air of authority.

Reiner was dismissive.

"Some damnfool gal, Cap'n Petrie. Spouting off 'bout a blizzard, as if I hadn't steered the train a far piece already across Kansas and Colorado."

"You don't know the wind that blows off our mountains," Lil warned. "Haven't you heard what that range is called? Wasatch."

"Wasatch so what!"

Lil let her eyes roll.

"You're the damn fool, Mister Reiner."

Petrie said, "How's that, missy?"

"Wasatch is the Ute words Wuhu' Seai spoken in American English," Lil said, striving to be patient. "My friend Jackson Farraday told me that."

"Jackson Farraday?"

Lil became proud. "Mister Farraday is a real scout who works for the Army. He's reliably versed in the lore of this land . . . more like the old trailblazers than your Mister Reiner, I'd say."

Reiner let out a roar of anger at Lil's slighting implication.

"Git, you sassy brat, before you feel the cut of a whip!"

But Winton Petrie stayed him. "Hold on, Reiner, the kid ain't told all yet, has she? What's so all-fired bothersome in this Wasatch word?"

Lil drew herself up in her saddle and said, as primly and straight-faced as she could, "Wuhu' Seai means a frozen – thing."

"How interesting!" a fresh voice put in. "What sort of thing?"

At the front of the covered wagon behind Petrie, a girl had appeared. She had light brown hair done in two pigtails beneath a frilly bonnet, dimples and a smattering of freckles across a pretty nose.

"Now then, Honesty!" Petrie said. "Be a good daughter and speak when you're spoken to." But his tone was indulgent.

"Why, hullo, friend!" Lil said. "Pleased to meet you. I'm Lil Goodnight." And she proceeded to answer the girl's question, taking a liking to her promising
quickness and eagerness for knowledge.

Once upon an infamous time, a similar approach had led Lil into all kinds of trouble when her pa, Ben Goodnight, had memorably sent her to a finishing school in Boston where she'd educated her fellow pupils, mostly the over-protected daughters of Eastern gentlefolk, in the ways of nature and the world. The extra-curricular favour had led to her expulsion.

"It's like this," Lil explained to the girl in the wagon. "A thing is what's also called a man's cock, or his pecker, or his tool – or a half-hundred other names. You see, a Ute chief informed Jackson that many Indians used to live between Heber and Provo. One day at the dawn of their history, the braves were out hunting when a mighty blizzard sprang up and they lost a man. When they found him he was dead and his thing was frozen stiff. So, because Indians weren't silly about this stuff before the Europeans changed them, and maybe as a warning, they named the mountains for his misfortune."

Honesty Petrie giggled excitedly. "Oh, did you hear that, Luke?" she said to Reiner. "What a terrible, wasteful tragedy!" For a moment, she was flirtatiously arch beyond her innocent years, which looked no more than seventeen in sum. Then, more demurely to Lil, "I can't wait to tell your interesting story to my friend Prudence!"

But Reiner was seething and her father had gone red in the face.

"No, you shall not, young lady!" Petrie said. "Prudence's father is a parson. You forget yourself. The Reverend Hannigan leads this party spiritually and he don't abide dirty talk."

Reiner produced a sickeningly false smile for Honesty.

"Your pa is right, honey," he said ingratiatingly. "A nice lady like yourself shouldn't be listening to coarse windies."

Chided, Honesty dropped her face and sighed daintily, but from beneath the frill of her bonnet she flashed Lil a look that was surely rebellious if not conspiratorial.

Though Lil was irritated to hear her information dismissed as a coarse tale, it wasn't an apt time for palaver. The wind was starting to whistle and bend and pluck at the sparse tussocks of grass.

"Well, anyway," Lil said, addressing the men, "less'n you gents fancy being found dead with your important parts in a state of irregular stiffness, now's the time to turn your wagons and livestock off this exposed trail and head for shelter."

"And where do we find this shelter?" Petrie asked.

"Follow me. The Flying G – that's my father's outfit – has a line camp in a valley only a mile east. Your wagons can be there in a half-hour. In the lee of the valley's northern flank and its timber, you'll have a mite of protection, and there's watering places and patches of willows along the creek."

"I see," Petrie said, starting to give the proposal consideration.

"I gathered the best part of my pa's herd in this section and drove them to the valley for the winter. The cabin was warm and snug for me with plenty of firewood handy, food stores and books. Only hard work I had to do was chop holes in the ice on the creek so the cows could keep drinking."

Quick, frowning reflection made her realize that wasn't the entire truth of it. "Oh, and kill a mountain lion that was stalking a calf, and chase off a pack of
wolves, and haul a big old steer out of a tangle of brush."

Reiner scoffed disbelievingly. "The kid's full of bullshit, Cap'n! 'Sides, her pa won't want our critters mixing in with his longhorns. Either that or his waddies'll steal 'em."

Lil's eyes flashed. "That's a lie! The Flying G aren't thieves! We can fix a rope corral for your domestic stuff easy."

The wagoners' guide rudely turned his back on her.

"Keep 'em rolling!" Reiner yelled, the wind seeming to snatch and spread the word as it left his coarse lips. "There's a pass up ahead. We can get offa this damn mountain before the storm hits if we hurry."

"Sure, Luke!" a wagoner called back. "Time's a-wastin'!"

Lil knew the truth of it was that the pass Luke Reiner saw as an escape route was anything but. Most storm winds were funnelled through it with added velocity. The wagon train and its occupants would be lashed there ferociously by the coming sleet or snow.

Lil felt foreboding as a hard knot within her stomach. These foolish men, especially their guide, Luke Reiner, wouldn't take her advice. Plainly, the arrogant Reiner would soon as give an arm as give anyone else a say in directing the wagon train. That plus, she suspected, he liked to keep the wagonmaster's pretty daughter impressed. . . .

She was sorry for the wagoners' womenfolk and the buttons who had no choice but to accompany their elders on the long and gruelling adventure. But she could do no more. If only Jackson were here! He would know what to do for the best. He always knew!

It was some months since she'd last seen her reluctant hero, but during her sojourn at the line camp, he'd never been far from her thoughts. Not for long
could she thrust remembrance of his solid reliability out of her mind.

Flakes of snow began to fall, whirling and dancing on the wind in wild pirouettes at first. The wagon women who were afoot clutched their skirts to stop the wind from lifting them, and ran at their men's urging to climb into the wagons.

A wagon train – lumbering, heavily laden – generally moved at a speed of around two miles an hour. Able-bodied women and children customarily walked beside the wagons, like the men. Emigrant parties averaged ten miles a day. With good weather, the 2,000 mile journey from Missouri to California or Oregon would take about five months.

With a maximum load of passengers, Reiner was now attempting to force four or five miles an hour out of these wagons. Lil knew the draught animals, oxen or horses, would not be able to sustain such a pace. It was unlikely Petrie's expedition would even make the pass without capsizes or other accidents.

The snow was changing swiftly with each gust of wind from feathery lightness to sharp, stabbing needlepoints. Hurled on by the rushing wind, it laid quickly. In an incredibly short time, the slope before Lil was covered by a thickening white carpet.

The wagon train vanished before her narrowed, watering eyes into a relentless, blinding snow storm.

What to do?

She tugged down her hat-brim, tied it securely under her chin, turned her collar up around her neck till it shielded her cold ears, and pulled up a neckerchief to protect her face from the stinging lash of icy snow. Winter was coming back with a vengeance, taking what had to be a late, unfortunate, last fling.

It was going to be a first-class blizzard for sure. Landmarks were rapidly disappearing in the whiteout conditions, though she had every confidence Rebel would know their trail back to the line camp and she had few worries for her own safety.

Her thoughts were with the women and children of the wagon train – especially the pretty one called Honesty Petrie. She had a weird feeling she'd met her before though she knew she couldn't have.

Yet it was overlaid by the other feeling she had, that if she didn't do something she might never see Honesty or her companions again.

How could a spurned country girl and her horse help?

Preoccupied, Lil gave Rebel's neck a gentle pat. "This looks like it's going to get bad," she murmured. "Better turn back to the cabin for now."

[Read on in UNDER A MINUTE!]

 





Praise for Chap O'Keefe and Misfit Lil
****
"You could as well have been watching a movie as
reading a book. . . O'Keefe writes westerns with the
coolness of a hired gun."
– New Zealand Herald


"Misfit Lil . . . . What a terrific name for a character,
eh? This book belongs to an endangered species: the
western. As for the story: totally professional, as you
would expect, and a lot of fun. By my count, Misfit Lil
Fights Back
is the author's sixteenth book, so he knows
how to do the job. Ms Lil has appeared before, and
doubtless will again."
– Grumpy Old Bookman

"If reprinting Chap O'Keefe's book goes over well (and
I can't see how it wouldn't!), maybe you can do some
more classic BHWs in the future. Oh, and I entered
your Misfit Lil contest, too."
– James Reasoner

". . .the quintessential action-packed western."
– Saddlebums Western Review

"Yep, pardners . . . Chap spins a mighty fine yarn that
should send yuh moseyin' on down tuh yuh local
bookshop pronto. This excitin', fast-paced, quickdrawin'
book is jest thuh thing for puttin' in the
cowhands' Christmas stockings."
– NZ Rural Press

"Misfit Lil . . . Chap O'Keefe's daring babe of the West."
– The Tainted Archive

"Misfit Lil Rides In is a fast-paced book that relates the
adventures of independent-minded, tough cowgirl
Lilian Goodnight. Lil is a fine horsewoman, expert at
roping calves and driving cows and is an excellent shot
with a pistol, too. Apparently, she can also out-cuss
her father's ranch-hands. . . . Most enjoyable and
recommended."
– Ross Morton

"Misfit Lil makes for an engaging lead character."
– Western Fiction Review

"Misfit Lil Cheats the Hangrope is a fine and eminently acceptable
 western, beautifully written as always, with a nice line in
dry humour, good characterization, a whole string of neat
 and imaginative sequences, and a mystery that certainly
baffled this reader right to the end. Refreshing and
bold . . . it takes western fiction in an exciting new
direction and this, I believe, is a major selling-point."
– David Whitehead

"The Misfit Lil series is a favourite amongst western fans, and no wonder. Each book in the series all are standalone novels though delivers equal parts fun and adventure. This book is a paperback original and the
first-ever release from a new publisher. Well worth getting."
Jack Martin, author of The Tarnished Star and Arkansas Smith







MORE EXCERPTS

The Sheriff and the Widow

Liberty and a Law Badge

Blast to Oblivion

Misfit Lil Cleans Up

A Gunfight Too Many

Misfit Lil Hides Out

Misfit Lil Robs the Bank

Faith and a Fast Gun